Happy Memorial Day? There’s no such Thing.

Memorial Day at the Crossroads

“Merry Christmas.” Well, of course. “Happy Holidays.” Again, no problem. It’s good to acknowledge that some months contain not only a succession of holidays, but also of holiday meals. That makes me happy. “Happy Hanukkah.” Yep. “Happy New Year!” (Not “Happy New Year’s,” unless it’s followed by “Day.”) Both “Happy Ramadan” and “Happy Passover” are appropriate. “Happy ‘Martin Luther King Day?’” No. Not even close. Wrong on two counts, which I’ll explain in some later gentle tirade.

The most egregious inappropriate “Happy,” in my opinion? “Happy Memorial Day.” How does one have a “Happy Memorial Day?”

Here’s an abbreviated history of the day for those who were born after it became a three-day weekend extravaganza in 1971. Memorial Day began at the close of the Civil War when emancipated people honored black soldiers who had been dishonored in death at the hands of Confederate soldiers. Former Confederates commemorated the service of their fallen by decorating their graves with flowers.

These celebrations became known as “Decoration Day” and were generally held during the spring and early summer because the weather was pleasant and fresh flowers were available. Northerners adopted the…