Without the context of slavery, we would not be calling one another "n@@s," because we wouldn't (I hope) have internalized the hatred and contempt that whites had/have for us. Do people get it? Being called "out of our names" is a recognized insult, but we then do it ourselves! Would we treat one another with more respect if we didn't use it? Who knows, but it's worth a try.

Is it "respectability politics?" Maybe it is, but not in the way that respectability politics is generally interpreted. We're not trying to look polite or respectable for other groups; we are respecting ourselves.